While travel is generally quite enjoyable, the longer term backpacker will, at some point, face the inevitable. Said traveller will need to take precious time away from travel-related tasks (like watching TV on a laptop, not going to museums, trying not to get mugged, etc) to perform a chore that is as annoying as it is frequent (it is very frequent). Yes, I’m talking about the area/bag/space in your backpack that, day by day, gets heavier and fuller, and eventually engulfs your storage, staring at you rudely, smell-ily.
Laundry.
Yep, even if you try to avoid this by carrying an obelisk sized backpack (more fresh clothes), or drop your standard of hygiene through the floor, eventually, you will be refused entry into respectable institutions, like restaurants, or shared bathrooms (clearly a catch-22 type situation). Let’s face it, while food, architecture, culture, and language vary vastly across geography, most societies have one thing in common – everybody does laundry.
Given how washing clothes is pretty much the ‘thread that binds civilizations,’ one would think that laundromats would be ubiquitous, and the task would be easy to execute, at a reasonable price, regardless of where in the world you might be. Shouldn’t you just be able to walk up to the hotel reception, point at your bag of clothes and charade-act-out ‘wash clothes’? Shouldn’t hotel staff, or even people on the street be able to point you in the direction of the nearest place where someone (like an old school dhoby) or something (you know, washing machines) could help you get.it.done?
You would think so, wouldn’t you?
Hah. Well, you’re wrong. Obviously. Or else I wouldn’t be right here talking about the issue. Right?
As it turns out, this is one of those taboo, hush-hush topics that every traveller sweeps under the rug, and that doesn’t get talked about enough. The fact is, getting laundry done easily and on the cheap is still tricky. There’s a sweet spot when it comes to hotels and guesthouses. Go to anyplace half-way decent, and you get charged on a per item basis (6$ for a pair of jeans – WHAT?). Go someplace cheap, and you risk dying a no-facilities death. Also, if you don’t generally stay in hostels and guesthouses all that much, places that charge by weight/load are few and far between. Over our trip, we sometimes specifically contacted hotel staff prior to our stay to check about laundry – it’s an actual filtering criteria! Can you imagine? Laundry! You find a decent place in the right location at the right price, and the guy goes “yea of course we have laundry, it’s 2.5$ for a pair of socks. It’s cheap, we charge by the pair!”
But, silver lining, laundry usually makes for a good story (lol), and really plugs you into the character of a place. In Lithuania, for instance, the closest laundromat was about an hour’s walk away, nowhere close to a train or bus. Fun – carrying a massive bag of clothes across town, and back. This way though, we got to play charades with the laundromat lady “What do we press, where’s the detergent, when should we be back?” Actually – a tangential question – would you think that clothes weigh the same before and after laundry? I’m genuinely asking.
In Irkutsk, we prioritized getting an apartment with a washing machine, so we didn’t pay attention to some less-than-positive reviews about the wifi at the place – turns out wifi just didn’t work. So yes, while our clothes smelled sweet, our facebook feeds were dry.
Most recently, in Mongolia, the first guesthouse we stayed at had a decent laundry service. The second one we stayed at didn’t. So I got a taxi, piled the bags in, and went to our previous guesthouse. Getting there was already a challenge– my cabbie didn’t speak a word of English. He was a large, pudgy man with a genial face and kind eyes. He hadn’t shaved in a few days, and while he was pretty dishevelled in his button up shirt, he seemed like the kind of man who might’ve been quite athletic when younger. But now, he spent his days with his back stuck to the leather seat of his car, driving carefully, breathing heavily. Naturally, the only way for me to communicate with the man was via Google translate – I wanted him to wait at the guesthouse while I dropped the bags off, and then bring me back (yes, it was THAT complex). When we reached our designation and I asked him to wait (by showing him my phone), he started gesticulating wildly, eyes popping, pointing at the screen, mumbling “terrorist, terrorist.” Apparently, Google, in its infinite wisdom, somehow chucked up the Mongolian word for terrorist on my screen. Don’t ask me how or why. I firmly said to the man, while clutching these two large bags, “No. No terrorist.” There was a pause, and I could see him think. A second later, he smiled, and we both chuckled. “You, wait, here,” I said to him, to which he nodded agreeably.
After walking the short distance to my old guesthouse, I was faced with my final test. I had to talk my way into getting guest-prices for the laundry after having checked out about 4 days prior. (“I know I’ve checked out man, but I stayed here last week. No, no, it’s not that I checked out because I don’t like this place, it’s um, for um, location. Puhlease, laundry!”). Long story short, something about a booking.com positive review, he agreed, and my quest was completed.
I guess I’m nearing the end of my rant/blogpost here. Moral of the story – just because you don’t talk about dirty laundry, doesn’t mean it doesn’t exist.
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“Oh I just wash my own clothes when I travel,” I hear you say. Lol, you smelly liar.
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